All Posts By

jr_havlan

Hammadown (Chapter 9)

By Poker Story 2 Comments

No more five month layoffs for the EBPG! The gang is back at the table and eager to purge themselves of immeasurable stores of silliness. We eat a stupid amount of food (minus the usual box of cookies), listen to a completely unpredictable variety of music, tell hilarious barely-ever-before-heard stories and jokes, and almost everybody gets in on the feel-good feeling of big-pot sweeping.
Big Pot Sweeping: It’s big-pot sweeping the nation!
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Hammadown (Chapter 8)

By Poker Story 2 Comments

This long-awaited edition of The Hammadown was even longer-awaited because it took me over two weeks to make sense out of the notes I scribbled while pretending I was in possession of my basic faculties.
But the wait is over!!
Food is shared, chips are exchanged, jokes are enjoyed, and weed is smoked and eaten. And it was all with the fully-vaccinated confidence that, on this joyous eve, none of us would die of anything other than age-related heart failure.
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Week of Feb. 8

By Monologue No Comments

This week: Let’s talk about the weather; If Black History Month happens but white people don’t acknowledge it, does it make a noise?; GOATs might be able to eat a tin can but they sure as hell can’t hold their liquor; And if knowing Donald Trump should have been convicted is wrong, I don’t want to be right.
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Week of Feb. 1

By Monologue No Comments

This week: What Groundhog Day reveals about human evolution; An in-depth look at Marjorie Taylor Greene’s unimaginable shallowness; A different kind of pillow fight; Another special appearance by the one and grossly Al Goldstein; And “Secretary Pete”! Sounds good to me.
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Week of Jan. 25

By Monologue 3 Comments

This week: Finally we can get on with the task of actually making America great again; What do 4-dollar-a-pop video game rentals and a Wall Street collapse have in common?; “That’s an executive order, son!”; A picture on a twenty tells a thousand words; There’s a reason you never see a “Gone Fishin'” sign on the door of a Subway sandwich shop; And, of course, assholes.
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The Final Trumpdown

By Monologue 4 Comments

This week: Profiles in ignorance: Trump supporter edition; Who’s more responsible – the lemmings or the lemming master?; “Rudy The Gross” cements his place in the most awful section of the history books; And my humble suggestion for Joe Biden’s first act as president.
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My New Year’s Dump

By Monologue 4 Comments

This week: “Happy new year” or “shitty old year”?; Will 2021 be an awkward rebound year or America’s chance to have crazy make-up sex with itself?; 10 semi-random things we might actually be able to look forward to; And if 2020 was a music video, I think I found that video.
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My Holiday Dump

By Monologue No Comments

This week: The unspeakable horrors of yet another War on Christmas; Herr Donald was this close to becoming just another crazed, low-level, third world dictator; You get 600 dollars! You get 600 dollars! Every-body gets 600 dollars!; Trump’s Confederacy of Dunces increases its ranks yet again; How our president un-worked his ass on; And the surprising final stop on COVID-19’s “2020: Fuck The World” tour.
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Week of Dec. 14

By Monologue No Comments

This week: What’s fat and orange and worse than COVID?; How do Trump supporters live with themselves and how the fuck will we live with them?; Mitch and Vladimir sitting in a tree, c-o-n-c-e-d-i-n-g; Behold! The combination of church and state just as the Founding Fathers planned it; And anti-vaxxers now have a whole new reason to go fuck themselves.
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